One day in the life of a Desaparecido: Remembering Jonas Burgos and others who disappeared fighting, believing

It’s been many nights since you last saw me. And I am not sure if you will see me ever again. I am somewhere here. Between the sky and earth, I live in my memory of life outside here, underneath the resplendent sky, on the goodness of the earth. You brought me outside and made me see the beauty of life and the world. Unlike here, devoid of what is outside, of life, of vibrant life.

I am somewhere here. Bound by darkness and solitude, I cling to the sound of your prayers. I could sense in the silence of this wickedness, your deep concern on me. For I feel consolation when I close my eyes and see your face near me, touching mine. Your hands bring warmth, your breath brings life. I could die in that thought, but you keep me going.

“You shall overcome this.”

That voice is my food, my nourishment, my hope. 

I am still somewhere here. Could you hear me?

I think they have taken away my voice. I could not even remember the sound of my name. The last time I shouted, my mind and heart were full of cries I could not express. I could only cry, but my tears have long been dried.

I am somewhere here. Please find me.

I would like to be back to your arms. To fight the coldness, I crumple myself like when I was inside you. The coldness has numbed me. I could not move from here. Each day, faintly I could say with all my will.

Here. Me.

I am not angry. I am not vengeful. No, I am not, forgotten.